A Funny Thing Happened On The Way Home...

I received a call from the school today that Deborah was in the clinic with a tummy ache. So, like a good Mom I rushed to the school to pick her up, and being a real Mom, I was hoping that if she was going to throw up that maybe she'd go ahead and do it at the school, before I arrived.

As soon as we walked out of the school, it was questionable whether she was really sick. She was talking 1,000 words per minute almost running to the car. Then she wanted to go to Sonic for lunch. When I denied her request, she asked for White Castles. Hmmm, definitely not sounding like a tummy ache.

I questioned whether I had made the right decision to rush to the school to pick her up. Maybe I should have encouraged the school to feed her lunch and send her back to class. Then the best conversation happened.

She was asking me why we can't eat out whenever she wants. So, I explained that Daddy works hard to earn money so that he can pay our bills and we shouldn't just waste the money that Daddy works hard to earn. She thought it would be nice if Daddy could just work every day but Sunday and get lots and lots of money. I explained that I thought it would be nice if Daddy could be home every night and on weekends, AND still have all the money we need to do the things Heavenly Father wants us to do.

She said, "Yea, but it would take him a long time to get here every night." I explained that some Dads do come home every night after work, like at 5 o'clock. She said:

"Wow! They must have a faster plane than Dad's!"



I'm still laughing...

Best Thing From Church

My favorite quote from Church today: 

"He wants nothing more than for us to return to live with Him.  

It's the happiest thing I've ever heard."

~Jacob Andrus, 18 years old

Johnathon

Johnathon, Deborah and I visited the play center waiting room at the hospital on Saturday morning.  Johnathon had a lot of fun playing with the Wedgits. 

Annual Hospital Visit?

I thought we might make it through this spring season without what seems to be Ryan's annual hospital trip.  However, Ryan was having problems with his breathing on Thursday.  We kept him on oxygen all day Thursday and all night.  Where there hadn't been any improvement on Friday morning and he seemed to be working hard to breathe, even with supplemental oxygen, I made the decision to take him to the Emergency Room. I spoke with his primary care physician and he agreed that it was the best plan of action.  He was leaving town that afternoon and thus he made sure that I had his cell phone number so that I could reach him if I needed anything and so that I could keep him up to date.  Do you see how blessed we are?

After being in the Emergency Room for a while, we found out that he had Enterovirus and Rhinovirus.  For most of us, that's just the common cold.  Nothing serious. For Ryan, however, it can get serious.  The chest xrays showed that the lungs were surprisingly clear, but he was essentially drowning in his secretions.  Unfortunately for Ryan that meant we had to do some deep suctioning.  If you don't know what that means, imagine a vacuum cleaner with a skinny hose.  Then stick the hose down your throat or up your nose to suck all the gunk out of your body.  Not fun.

The attending physician was going to send him home since we have supplemental oxygen at home and the ability to do suction,   However, Ryan's respiration rate was so high that she was concerned that he might just tire out and so she decided she needed to admit him.  So we spent one night at Pedi and thankfully we had one of our favorite doctors there.  He had some great advice and referred us to the best two Pulmonologists in our area.  They are expecting my call and took my cell phone number so that if they don't hear from me, they can call me.  Nice, right?  Hopefully, we can find out what we need to do to strengthening Ryan's lungs.

In the meantime, I'm sure thankful for pulse ox monitors, portable oxygen machines, nurses, doctors, even suction machines ... although they are definitely not my favorite thing to use.  I'm really thankful for all the kind people on our team.  I am so thankful for all the resources that Heavenly Father provides to make this journey a little easier and more joyful.

Anchors

As many of you know, I am taking a couple of college classes through Brigham Young University Idaho.  This past week for my Foundations of Religion Course 122, we studied the Book of Ether from the Book of Mormon.  It's one of my favorite sections of the Book of Mormon.  If you've read my blog for a while, you've heard me talk of it before.  It is the story of the Jaredites.

Each week we are required to participate in a discussion board.  This is meant to simulate the classroom discussions that we of course miss out on when doing an online classroom.  When I first started the classes, I thought the discussion boards would be rather lame.  However, I have found that they can be really wonderful.  Some people put more effort into their contributions than other people.  Of course, that's true in an actual classroom as well.

This week I asked permission from one of my classmates, Shannon Lowman, to share her post.  I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.  First, let me share with you the verse she references:

Wherefore, whoso believeth in God 

might with surety hope for a better world, 

yea, even a place at the right hand of God,

which hope cometh of faith, 

maketh an anchor to the souls of men,

which would make them sure and steadfast,

always abounding in good works,

being led to glorify God.

"A single word in Chapter 12 (verse 4) jumped out at me: "anchor".  It is such a visual word.  I live in San Diego, home to numerous shipyards.  If you've ever seen an anchor ... I mean, a real anchor .. not just a flimsy motor boat anchor, but one that can stop a ship, it is a memorable sight.  The USS Enterprise, an aircraft carrier, has two anchors, each weighing 32 tons!  But the strength and security of the ship is not just dependent on its anchor, but rather what it is anchored to!  "The anchor prevents a ship from drifting away due to the water currents or tide. A popular misconception is that the anchor itself acts as the main weight to "secure" the ship in its position. On an anchoring run, the ship would lay the anchor together with a length of its iron cables on the seabed.... it is not the weight of the anchor, but the weight of the huge iron cables connected to the anchor that "secures" the ship." (wikianswers.com)  Elder Richard G. Scott said in Conference 1993, "Anchor your life in Jesus Christ, your Redeemer.  Make your Eternal Father and His Beloved Son the most important priority in your life--more important than life itself, more important than a beloved companion or children or anyone on earth.  Make their will your central desire.  Then all that you need for happiness will come to you."  Our security comes, not from how strong we are, but from the immobility of what we are anchored to.  Elder Scott assures us that everything else will fall into place when we are properly anchored to the Rock of our Redeemer."

Thank you, Shannon, for saying it so beautifully and for letting me share it!

I hope we will all anchor our lives to Jesus Christ that we may enjoy the security and strength that will come from being anchored to the Rock of our Redeemer!  Happy Easter!

Cough, cough

The nurse texted me on Friday morning while I was at an appointment to say:  "Mrs, Tina, no fever, pulse ox 95% or better & color is good ... normal HR, concerned about the definite wheezing & diminished breath sounds in right lung & he's tummy breathing.... changed his position & gave 4 puffs of inhaler, very little change in breath sounds."  This was unsettling since we were already on day 7 of antibiotics (Augmentin) for a respiratory and ear infection.

So, I scheduled an appointment with the Doctor and thankfully he was able to get us right for an exam.  He agreed with the nurse's assessment and sent us for chest x-rays.  The radiologist saw chest infiltrates and sent back a diagnosis of Bronchial Pneumonia.  He gave Ryan a large dose of another antibiotic, Rocephin, a prescription for Azithromycin, and suggested we use the Ventolin inhaler 3-4 puffs ever 3-4 hours and a probiotic. 

On Saturday, Ryan pretty much slept all day long.  When he'd wake up, he'd cough and then cry.  It was obvious from the cry that he was in pain. 

This morning I was woke up by an early morning phone call.  It was the doctor's office.  They wanted to know if we could bring Ryan in to see the doctor on call.  Our doctor had asked her to see Ryan this morning to check him to make sure he was getting better.  Isn't that great?  That is one of the reasons I think he's so great!  And, the good news... Ryan's lungs did sound better today.  Yeah!

We are, of course, to stay the course.  Finish the antibiotics, protect him while his immune system is especially vulnerable and watch for any signs of deterioration. 

I am SO thankful for good men and women who dedicate so much time to providing good care to families.  I know they make sacrifices.  And, I'm thankful for all the modern technologies and medicines that allow us to treat things that used to take the lives of loved ones.  Counting my blessings.

Great Quote

Today 

is the 

PERFECT

day

for a

PERFECT

day

Oxygen

I'm so thankful for the ability to have a pulse ox monitor and oxygen at home.  Tonight it saved us from having to go to the hospital.   So, we'll get through the night and see the doctor tomorrow morning just to make sure there's nothing that needs to be treated.

Guys Today

What do you call guys today?  You know the ones that we might have called cute or handsome in my day? (That'd be the 80's, in case you're wondering.)  They're too old to call adorable and I don't think "sharp" is how I would describe them ... at least not this time.  I'm not their age so I'm pretty sure it'd be REALLY CREEPY if I called them "smokin'" or "hot."  In fact, I feel weird even typing that. 

I'm not sure what to call these boys. I don't want to insult these guys.  So, I'll just say they have IT.  They have what Moms liked in the guys they dated a gazillion years ago.  Good looking, great sense of humor, fun, polite, dress well, and just plain cool.... Oh, and a really important one ... really good with parents.  (That's big!)

So, Tuesday night three of these guys with IT showed up at our house and one was carrying a door.  To understand why they brought a door to our house, you have to know that the theme to the local high school prom is Titanic.  (Still not understanding why the door?  Near the end of the movie, Titanic, Jack and Rose were floating on a door.)  Long story short, one of these guys with IT asked Jessica to prom by bringing over a door.  Cool, right?

A great quote

I saw this quote on the back of a t-shirt...

He will catch me 

when I fall,

or He will teach me

how to fly.

Isn't that great?  I love it!

 

Animals

Ryan's class has been learning about animals at school.

Ryan did not seem to enjoy being an elephant.

Let It Go

Tonight I'm finishing lesson preparations for tomorrow's Relief Society class.  I'm leading the discussion on "Of You It is Required to Forgive."  I started preparing this lesson during mid November and so I've had lots of time to ponder the subject.

For Christmas I received a book that I've been wanting to read called, "Let It Go" by Chris Williams.  You can watch an interview about his story.  Just click here. 

There are many profound truths about forgiveness in this book.  But one really stuck out to me tonight.  I won't tell you the full story behind the statement as I hope you'll read the full book.  I just want to share this thought with you. 

He says of an experience that had happened much earlier in his life, "I could see what I had allowed the Lord to make of my life because of what I experienced.  I could stop wondering, Why was this allowed to happen to me at such a young age?, and instead I could start detailing what Christ was able to make of my life and who He was able to bless through me because that [it] was allowed to happen."

Have you had an experience like that in your life?  Something that you wondered why it was allowed to happen to you?  What if, instead of questioning why it happened, you were to detail what Christ was able to make of your life and who He was able to bless through you because of what happened? 

The New Look for Ryan

On December 4, the morning started as usual.  It was great. Ryan was in a good mood.  Then we went to therapy.  I didn't go back with him, but the nurse did.  He has a great therapy team that I trust.  When I came back to pick him up there was an obvious tone of concern in the nurse's voice and she said they needed me to come back.  As soon as I heard Ryan I knew something was wrong.  The PT said, I needed to get him to the Dr's and see what was going on with his hip.  She thought it had come out of the socket.  His right leg was having spasms.  He was in obvious pain.  His cry was one of definite pain.  So, I picked him up and we took him to the van.  As soon as we got him loaded, I started driving toward the dr's office, which is located near the hospital as well.  She said she'd meet us at the hospital.


At the hospital they did x-rays.  The ER doc first came in and said the right hip was fine. Then a minute later she came looking quite shocked and said, "But, the left femur has a complete fracture."  Then she took me to see this picture:

I added the square to cover his privates.  It just seemed a little weird to post them on my blog.  :)

Within an hour, they had Ryan in the operating room.  They used pressure "blocks" to cast his leg back into place.  They did not pin it.  He will spend the next 6 weeks in this Spica cast.  He'll need to be rotated every 2-3 hours, around the clock.  The cast goes all the way up to his chest, is open on the tummy for his mic-key button, and open in the diaper area ... for obvious reasons.  As you can see below, it goes to his toes on the left leg and to his knee on the right.  The bar between the legs is not a carrying handle as Dwight would have you believe.  It's a stability bar.

Well, here we go... I'll blog more when I wake up...

So...

Go, Ryan!

Look what Ryan did today!

Do you see that smile?

This stuff is exhausting!

Ryan

Ryan's nurse caught Ryan working hard at school.  This is super awesome!  You might notice in this that his teacher, Mrs. V, is just barely supporting him at the lower back.  If you watch really closely, you can also see that he's engaging his arms to support himself and he's really using his right arm especially on the floor. 

I hope you enjoy this as much as I did!

Hmmm... Is there a way to turn a video?  I don't know.  Well, I guess you'll just have to lie down to watch it.  ;)

Bloomin' Flowers

This morning I went to the Temple to help plant flowers.  I really know nothing about how to plant flowers and thought it would be a great opportunity to learn.  I worked under the supervision of the nicest lady, Sue.  She was very kind in teaching me how to do things.  We made a great pair. 

We planted  Liberty Rose Pink Snapdragons, Clear Crystal White Alyssums, Blue Pansies, and Peacock Red Flowering Kale.  We also planted some yellow flowers, but I don't remember what they were.  Sometime I'll have to take a picture of the flower beds that I worked on and post it here.  The Temples always have such beautiful flowers.  I'm glad I had the chance to work on them. 

Prayer

If you have read my blog before you probably already know that I believe in the power of prayer.  I know many of you also believe in the power of prayer.  Well, this past Monday I was (once again) taught a lesson on prayer. 

For the past few weeks, I have struggled to figure out how I would solve what seemed to me to be a very difficult problem.  I needed to figure out a ride for Jessica and David to an activity and 45 minutes later Deborah and Johnathon need to be some place else, and I still need to manage Ryan's needs as well.  From the very first time I prayed about it Carol's name came to mind.  Well, that didn't make any sense.  Carol doesn't have any children.

I kept praying about it and thinking through the problem.  Every time I prayed about it, Carol came to mind.  Every time I thought about it, Carol came to mind.  That was confusing.  Why would I be thinking of Carol?  She's a great lady, but all of her kids are grown ups. 

By the weekend before I had to resolve the issue, I had even considered crazy options like having all 5 get completely ready to go and taking them all with me when I drop off David and Jessica.  And, even crazier options.

Well, Monday finally rolled around and I had to have this resolved by Tuesday morning.  I was sure I wasn't getting any answers to my prayers.  Nothing.  But, I prayed yet again.  Sometimes we just have to pray more diligently, right?  And, again with the Carol answer.

So, I waited a few hours and summoned up all my courage and called Carol.  I explained how I really didn't understand why she was the answer but perhaps she'd have some good advice since she had raised several kids.  I briefly explained our situation and then she said, "Well, I can just take your kids."

She made it sound so easy!  Let me tell you:  I sobbed.  I sobbed because the whole time I was fretting and stressing about this problem, Heavenly Father had been lovingly giving me the answer over and over again.  But, I hadn't been listening.  I had been unable to identify His voice.  I had been so busy trying to solve my own problem that I had listened to Him and He had already solved my problem for me.

It's made me wonder how many times I do that in my life?  Are there other times when I busy myself solving my own problems when I could just turn them over to Him?

I'm so grateful to Him for being persistent and patient.  I'm so grateful for Carol's help!  What a huge blessing!  I hope you all have people like Carol in your life.

Great Friends

Johnathon was invited to go with his good friend today to the corn maze.  

They had a great time!  

We are so thankful for good friends!

Good News from Houston

There were several bright spots for this trip.  First, they ditched the barium enemas during the CT's.  That was a welcome relief!  I met some amazing people with miraculous stories.  And, I dodge all biopsies!  Most spots have not grown at all except for the spots on my thyroid.  Those have grown some but are still rather small and they appear to be benign.  Yay!  However, my lymphoma doc is referring me to another department for a consultation within the next 2 weeks.

And, there's more good news... After reviewing some new research and my records they decided not to do maintenance chemo.  Recent research shows that "it doesn't increase survivability rates," especially for patients with refractory lymphoma, like me.  And, it has some risks that the doctor felt made it so that the risks do not outweigh the benefits.


In case you don't know, "survivability rate" is a term that oncologists throw around way too easily.  My cancer is a very survivable cancer.  It sounds much scarier in this case than it really is.  And, refractory lymphoma, just means that my lymphoma has been treated once, and has come back.

So, thank you all for thinking of me, your prayers, your love and support.  I am very blessed to have so many great friends and such a wonderful family!  

A Journal Post

Life has been crazy busy recently and I feel like I've been neglecting to do updates.  So, I thought I'd do a journal style post.  You know the journal entry where you try to catch up on the last 10 months all in one page?  Or, am I the only one who kept a journal that way?  :)

Many of you know that I put all the kids into public school this year, and some of you have been asking how it's going.  Thanks to some great advice the school year started very smoothly.  If I had to pick just one tip as the most helpful, I'd probably say it was when one of our new friends recommended laying out an entire week's worth of outfits for the younger ones.  Since public school requires the little ones to be up more than 2 hours earlier than before, it helps when they can just drag their sleepy selves into their closets and choose from pre-selected outfits.  Deborah adores her teacher, is "getting used to" classmates, but has made quite a few friends, really dislikes music time, loves art, and is very invested in getting her daily smiley faces from the teacher.  Johnathon is enjoying the academic side of things and is making great grades. I worried a lot about his handwriting skills, but they have improved significantly since starting school. He has struggled a little with figuring out the playground system and seems to be getting a handle on it now.  David found his lunch table immediately and is really enjoying latin club.  He is also in the high school's first play of the season.  So, he's busy and very happy.  Jessica is a senior this year and just anxious to be done.  Ryan is back in Mrs. V's class again and loves it.  He has a new Physical Therapist at the school who seems to be trying some new equipment with him. The same Vision, Occupational, and Hearing Therapists as last year continue to work with him.  They are all really fantastic!  So, we're very lucky that way!

Overall, I'm very pleased with how things are going.  I think the schools have a nice balance on how much homework they are sending.  I think the extracurricular activities at the high school level are WAY too time consuming, but other than that, I'm content.

BUT.... if I could traditionally home school, it would still be my preference.  Why?  For all the same reasons that I did it before.  I'm thankful that we live in a good school district where I feel comfortable sending my kids to school and I'm especially thankful that they have good teachers and good people in their lives. I feel comfortable ... well, only because I know I have done what is best for them at this time.  It was tough, and is still tough to have them gone all day.  I enjoy having my children around.  I enjoy learning with them. I enjoy their company.  I like them. 

 I might miss them, if I had time to miss them.  I have been asked several times what I'm doing with "all my free time."  Well, folks, the reason I put my kids in school was because I was severely over-scheduled and even with them in school, I have only managed to squeak out a few hours of free time in the past month. During that time, the first time, I cleaned my house for 4 hours.  The second time I went to the pool by myself and floated on the water for an hour in total peace.  And, the third time, I went to a friend's house and visited with her a few hours.  All three times it was really wonderful! 

So, you might ask what's keeping me so busy?  Most of you can probably guess.  Ryan's appointments, my appointments, the stacks of neglected paperwork, and my school work.

Ryan is mostly stable right now, thankfully.  He has not been seizing lately. I've been asked why. We haven't changed his medicine since that awful spell in November of last year, except to add a mid-day dose of the Lamictal.  Maybe it's the right medicine combination.  Maybe he's growing out of the seizures.  Maybe it's the blenderized whole foods diet.  Maybe it's a combination of all three.  Or, maybe it's just a tender mercy of the Lord.  I would prefer to attribute it to the latter.  Maybe due to His tender mercy He provided all that we needed in the way of medicines, the Doctors, the Doctors' intelligences, the knowledge for the diet, etc in order to help right.  However, we look at it, I can see God's hand in this miracle.  I'm sure you can, too.

After the most recent hospital visit for Ryan, which was due to low oxygen levels, we received new equipment at home for Ryan.  A few days after it was delivered it occurred to me that having oxygen delivered to our house, an oxygen concentrator, and a pulse oximeter really didn't even seem strange to me and that it probably should at least seem a little odd, or something.  It just seemed normal.  That is until I had to use it on Ryan. 

The Oxygen Concentrator

 There's really nothing normal about having a pulse oximeter attached to your 4 year old at home, and there's definitely nothing normal about being startled out of bed several times during the night to a loud noise that means his oxygen level is too low.  And, it really isn't normal to attach a nasal cannula to your child in middle of the night so that they can get their oxygen level back into the 90's.  But, it sure beats the heck out of rushing to the hospital, being stuck their for a minimum of 24 hours, and having Ryan pocked several times for mandatory blood work "just to be safe."  I'm thankful it's an option to have it in our home, as odd as it might be to have to use it.

The plan when I put the kids in school was to use the time to get caught up on stuff, take care of Ryan's medical stuff, my medical stuff, and do my school work.  One of the challenges I'm running into is that I'm spending far too much time doing my kids' chores.  They are gone for the majority of the day and the older kids have so much homework that I have struggled to figure out how much responsibility is fair.  I think I've leaned too far in the direction of leniency and now no one is even helping with chores.  So, those of you with kids in school, how do you do it?  Especially high school kids?  Are you the only one who cleans your house?  I've had someone suggest hiring someone to come in once a week, but right now we just have too many medical bills and besides it doesn't teach our children the responsibility. I really love the idea of serving my family, but I don't think I should be their servant.  I think there is a difference. 

As for college, I am loving it and this week I have at times wondered if I should have waited a little while longer to go back.  I am only take two classes -- just six credit hours.  I love the people I attend class with on Thursday night.  I love the subjects we are studying.  I am anxious to continue.  On the other hand, this week it has felt overwhelming to fit it into the schedule.  It has been hard to focus and to do my very best.  It has caused me to wonder if I was being selfish in going back right now.  

BUT ...
Here's what I know ... I know Heavenly Father asked me to go back and finish my degree. I know He led me to this specific path, and thus I know He can prepare a path for me to do it.  So, I will work hard to cheerfully do all the good that is required of me so that I can see the miracles that He will work in my life.

Have you had times like that in your life?  Times when you have had to just act in faith knowing that if you pushed through He would work miracles.  I know it works because I have seen it in my life before.  So, I'm counting on it again.